Sunday, July 7, 2013

Sad but true...

Is it true that the majority of our black men do not know God
Or is it just that they secretly fear him and thus fail to acknowledge him personally
Could it be as simple as never hearing about him when they were little boys
Did their parents fail to teach them about his mercy and his grace
Did the grandparents give praise on Sundays only and never mentioned his favor and his goodness the remaining six days of the week
Is that why so many African American women are leading the household
Because the strength and perseverance lies with her alone
Is she the reason we struggle day to day as if it's apart of our DNA
She rises early preparing the kids for school and then heads off to work two jobs
None of it phases her in the least because it's all she's ever known
She fails to take proper care of herself because there are too many task ahead and
each one must be completed
She holds a secret and burning desire to someday be rescued but never says it aloud fearing that "he" will never come for her
When she's afforded the free time she is glued to the reality television shows and the romance novels in hopes to briefly escape from the possibility that no real men exist
Not even seeing her father truly love her mother, never holding her hand
Never complimenting her, opening a door or even giving her reasons to smile
When she was a little girl she always looked at her dad, whenever he was around...wondering what it was that he did for a living
She knew her mom like the back of her hand ... disciplining, loving, caring, cooking, cleaning and listening
All while she never once uttered a bad word, never once complained as she made each one of her children feel special
She never mentioned his name when he wasn't home for dinner and she never forced us to show him any affection
It was like he was there but not really apart of our family
I guess that's why in my youth I never held any visions of becoming a bride
It wasn't my childhood dream and Cinderella never appealed to me
With all that I've witnessed and all that I know about today's black man
Please tell me why I burst into tears when the preacher said, "Today's society lacks real men of God."

(This was not written to stereotype the African American male.  The Spirit penned this piece)


Moanerplicity said...

Hmmm... You pose some provocative questions here.

I don't really feel that belief or disbelief is rooted in one's color, per-say. Background, yes. As children we can be introduced to God and religion. But GOD (or the fear of Him) can not be DRILLED into us forever, b/c all those rules, taboos, sins & sinners pointing accusatory fingers are usually the quickest way to run from Him ( & His Core Message: Love). Finding God has to become a personal journey in one's life. Keeping God close has to become more than a desire, but a real NEED.

As it pertains to Black Men:

Some of my brothers seem fated to walk a path paved by misfortune.

"I always hated that word: misfortune. It doesn’t give a damn who you are or what you do, if you pray or who you pray to— because misfortune has a will, a purpose and a God all its own. It’s just that simple, that random and sometimes... it’s just that freakishly tragic."

from Like Litter in the Wind by L.M. Ross


A Free Spirit Butterfly said...

I wholeheartedly agree my friend; color is not the's just from where I'm seated that my spirit was provoked to write this.

I have been in this career of Law Enforcement for 23 years and I am forced to view and participate in the killings, the self destruction and repeat offenders of my culture.

That coupled with the lack of respect and commitment to the marriage vows has given some validity to the post.

Loving God is indeed a choice. One that I didn't get the full opportunity to experience until a dear sweet male friend of mine unknowingly lead me to my Savior.

I held no personal or intimate relationship with God and I had no idea what LOVE was. I thought I knew, but discovered to be "Oh so wrong."

And now that I have discovered both, YOU are so RIGHT...keeping Him close is like the air that I breathe.

I once allowed Satan to convince me of who I wasn't, pointing his accusing finger at me and whispering in my mind.

TODAY, his lies bounce off of me and MY Armor is covered in the undeserving and gentle grace of my Father, The King of Kings!

Thanks for your intellect and for your visit.

Love and peace
CD :-)

Moanerplicity said...

My Sista,

Please know that I would never question the legitimacy of your or anyone else’s personal experience/testimony. When considering the uniqueness of your work situation, I would imagine you regularly witness acts of indifference, and the worst of humanity on a daily basis. Such experience will no doubt shape opinions. I fear witnessing of such violence, cold-heartedness and man’s inhumanity to man create an environment of pronounced negativity, creates/fosters already ingrained suspicion, and darkens the perception SOME in law enforcement hold for males of black and brown skin.

I think when we all begin to see people as people, not as generalities to be judged but as individuals with stories/histories/ reasons for who, what and why they are, then we will be able to better understand each other AS individuals (as opposed to potentially deadly stereotypes)… and there would be less Trayvon Martins to grieve. There would also be far fewer Sean Bells and Oscar Grants to mourn (to name but two; both black, unarmed & killed by cops).

I do not envy the stress, nor the awesome responsibility it takes to be a man or woman in blue.


As far as your interpersonal experiences, you OWN them and as such, you have every right to those feelings. Luckily, your lessons, though hard-earned, have been learned & your insight is far more spirit-based than ever before… & these qualities are what’s needed to guide you throughout your journey with a profound sense of Grace… and hopefully much JOY.



A Free Spirit Butterfly said...

Hey there my friend,

I didn't feel as though you were questioning anything!!!!

As my entire life has been rooted in DC, MD and VA, and I'm sadden by the lack of responsible men. I know they are out there, it's just far and few between from my limited view.

I just wish that more men would take ownership of their God given right to BE who the CREATOR created them to be. "STEP into greatness and SEE a whole new life!"

Our Society needs more Strong Men!

Fear is the enemy and I pray that we'd get to that point of "Feeling The Fear and Doing "IT" Anyway."

Nothing BUT Love!

A Lady's Life said...

Well with the rap they sing calling women bad names esp mothers, I think women are as much to blame as men. But the good women suffer as a result.And why don't women respect the fact that the man is married.
They just don't care this so called sisterhood. Look at Brangelina. Every one loves her and sees nothing wrong with what she did.
God is good to know and his laws followed for many reasons. Family is important to have and if you are not prepared to fight for it, then you are not ready for marriage either.You have to be a man to say no. Its not a popular word.

A Free Spirit Butterfly said...

Comment from a friend who could not post herself...

"You get an "A" for this piece.

Just to piggyback here: Oh absolutely, our brothers do know “of” Him, but to KNOW Him is to share a relationship with Him. This is what their “manhood” and “ego will do for them. They don’t want t appear to be soft as elevator music, so even with Our Lord, they play the “tough” role. The pray only IF it’s necessary. We lead the households because we don’t have a choice. Not many women in the Bible had to lead households alone, because their men trusted and believed in God, thereby being by our sides was a natural move.

Mention the Holy Spirit, the Cross, the Red Sea, Joseph, Deborah, Job or even the Garden of Eden and some of our brothers fold like laundry. Most believe that life is never ending. Some believe that it won’t happen to them. A few believe that He lives in us. A few trust in in Name Almighty. And isn’t it odd, too, that they don’t believe in the devil. That’s why he get them, because they are easy targets. Same sex marriage, little girls having sex and within 6 months to a year, give birth is an abomination.

The plan for God to save us went as planned. From Mary to Judas, from the Garden to the Romans’ spit, Jesus is still our savior.

Each day that He gives me, I appreciate and love Him for it and I let Him know it. How could anyone NOT acknowledge and love Him. Oh yeah, atheists – what a pitiful group, oh yeah ku klux klansmen – what a more pitiful group. Okay I be quiet now.

I love you from now on…..

A Free Spirit Butterfly said...

My Lady,

All I can say at this point is that to some degree, somewhere along the path, our ancestors and or parents failed. Not to condem or pass judgement on them. It's just a fact.

Satan is and always has been after the family. It's EXACTLY why He's a fallen angel and one of the very reasons that Eve "caved" and Adam fell immediately afterward.

The flesh is selfish, stubborn and weak. The very reason that we need a Savior. In my own strength, I AM NOTHING!

Psalm 78 reads in part: vs. 5-8
"He decreed statutes for Jacob and established the law in Israel, which he commanded our forefathers to teach their children, so the next generation would know them, even the children yet to be born, and they in turn would tell their children. Then they would put their trust in God and would not forget his deeds but would not be like their foretfathers-a stubborn rebellious generation whose hearts were not loyal to God, whose spirits were not faithful to him."

I used to be this person for many years, but I did not know what Christ had done for me. Not an excuse, but a reason.
I was not told by my parents or grandparents. His redemption and forgiveness is real. But his patience is soon coming to an end.

Love you dear friend!

A Free Spirit Butterfly said...

"Most believe that life is never ending. Some believe that it won’t happen to them. A few believe that He lives in us. A few trust in in Name Almighty."

Gloria, that somes pretty much somes it up. Misdirected beliefs in Self and lack of trust.

I know for me, trust was a huge hurdle to overcome...and as far as BELIEFS...I believed that I was doing the "right thing."

I read somewhere in the Book of Judges..."each did what was right in their own eyes."

Once again, the Word of God is all that we need to sustain a healthy, joyfilled life of peace and ultimately LOVE of self and others.

LOVE you sweet sister and so grateful that His healing brought us both together as we journey into His everlasting arms :-)

A Free Spirit Butterfly said...

@ Gloria

* pretty much sums it up...

A Lady's Life said...

Butterfly it doesn't matter what our parents did. We don't answer to them.

In the end the decisions we make in life belong to us and we alone are responsible for them.
You can't blame your parents.You never walked in their shoes.

As long as you know right from wrong and are in control of your own body and mind then the rest
of what happens to you is your responsibility.

When you feel you can't handle things, you ask for help.
We teach things like this at school.
Before you do a bad thing, you ask for help. If you don't ask and do a bad thing then it doesnt matter who is right or who is wrong. The fact is you did the thing and now have to face the consequences of it.

With a little compassion no one needs to do bad things and this is what religion is supposed to teach.

A Free Spirit Butterfly said...

My Lady, as we grow up, I wholeheartedly agree...but it starts at home.

Oftentimes the knowing doesn't come w/age...

And there are a lot of situations in a person's life that makes sense in "his/her" mind but in all actuality, it's the flesh and not the Spirit.

I thank My Father that He took hold of me and with His unconditional love, I was able to see my flaws, my unrealistic expectations and my vulnerabilities. He SAVED me before I could do anymore damage to myself or my grand-girls.

They see a strong, GOD fearing woman and that speaks volumes to what The Lord can do when we surrender "control" :-)

Love you!

A Lady's Life said...

So true.
It is hard to stand and hold your ground but it makes you a strong person and there are people watching even if you don't know them. They are learning and respecting you and know you for who you are.I'd say that is a good thing:)