Thursday, February 23, 2012

Maternal instincts...


This is my mom.  The photo was taken about 3 years ago and we had such a great time that night.  My mom is the life of every party she attends.  Her laughter, style and sense of humor is unlike anyone I know.  She is the original free spirit. Her DNA has transferred her creativity and youthful spirit throughout all five of her daughters.  Although I got her writing skills, there are some days where I wished she'd given me the cooking skills. Lol

The reason why I wanted to do this post is because my mom and I haven't always smiled so beautifully as shown above.  Our relationship had its share of emotional turmoil.  There were years where we didn't speak. I rarely saw her and had even convinced myself that if she doesn't want to build a bridge, then it was fine with me. That was so not the case.

As it turned out, I blamed my mom for almost everything that went wrong in my life.  I was supposed to be a Marine, not a teenage mother going to night school.  If only she'd given me the "talk" I would have never lost my virginity and ended up being a victim of domestic violence.  But what I didn't realized until my daughter came along, was that my mother did the best that she could with what she knew. 

I have to say that as distant as we were, when my marriage failed, my mom was the first person I reached out to.  I needed her, and all the wrongs of the past did not matter or exist.  I was wounded and I needed someone to tell me that it was going to be okay-that I was going to be okay.  She did and I was.

I was broken and she put me back together.  Today, our bond is stronger than its ever been and the love and compassionate that we have was something I never knew I was missing until it showed up and filled my heart.  I know that my grandmother is dancing in heaven. Just before she passed on, she had asked me to make peace with my mom.  At the time, I just couldn't see past the hurt.  This is one of the reasons why I preach how the power of forgiveness is truly freeing.  And it's truly a gift that you give to yourself.


6 comments:

Mizrepresent said...

This was very beautiful! Thanks for sharing!

Myriam said...

Hello there Ms. "China"

Long time! You both look lovely together. It's a beautiful story and the point about forgiveness is so ever true.

Myriam

Don said...

I have to say that as distant as we were, when my marriage failed, my mom was the first person I reached out to. I needed her, and all the wrongs of the past did not matter or exist. I was wounded and I needed someone to tell me that it was going to be okay-that I was going to be okay. She did and I was.


The same could've been written about my mom and I and a certain moment almost 6 years ago.

All beforehand which kept us distant...it didn't matter at that point in time.

The Marines LOVE your walk. Lol.

A Free Spirit Butterfly said...

Misrepresent I appreciate your visit and compliments as well. Thank you as always, for stopping by.

Sweet Myriam I have missed u. Love the photo and miss u on Facebook. I closed my account and reopened under an alias. Lol - Will look u up soon. Praying that your dreams are coming to pass. We both know that He is the one who makes it possible,

Love,
China

Hello Don and thanks for visiting. I love that you shared the fact that you went through something similar. I love it because in our moments of discouragement, uncertainties and oftentimes painful life lessons, we are not alone. Six years ago is when my life shifted in a direction that truly changed the trajectory of my life.

China

Last comment has me laughing out loud. Literally
:)

Blessed Tresses said...

Beautiful and very touching. You are so right about forgiveness. I had to learn myself that not forgiving and holding your hurt only hurts you in the long run. Thanks for sharing your story!

A Free Spirit Butterfly said...

GM Blessed Tresses. It seems we have something else in common. The peace that comes afterwards is truly priceless.

Thank you for coming by and make it an awesome day!